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Mormon Salt Lake Temple Adds Bitcoin to Balance Sheet

Salt Lake City, UT – The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints on Temple Street in Salt Lake City, Utah has allocated a portion of it’s $100 billion balance to purchase Bitcoin. The temple is currently undergoing renovations to increase capacity and renovations to improve the grounds. The Salt Lake Temple receives anywhere from […]

Vitalik Confirms Taliban Part Of Ethereum Premine

SINGAPORE – Following the Taliban’s recent takeover of Afghanistan’s major cities, intelligence authorities from the United States turned their attention to Ethereum creator Vitaly Dmitriyevich “Vitalik” Buterin. Authorities travelled to Singapore to interrogate Buterin following information that the Taliban had been involved in the 14-day premine sale of the cryptocurrency. In recent weeks a dormant […]

Man Paying 6.15 Bitcoin To Find Love

LONDON – After years of looking, a London bitcoiner (@BritishHodl) has decided to take an unorthodox approach; offering a woman Bitcoin in exchange for love. The offer does come with stipulations: The woman must be young and attractive, she must be in shape, she must know her place in the home: the kitchen, and she […]

Beta Variant Causing Erectile Dysfunction, Reduced Sperm Count

WASHINGTON – In an announcement Friday the CDC (Center for Disease Control) announced that the newest coronavirus strain, beta, has been disproportionately affecting vaccinated males. “We have found that the beta strain is causing erectile dysfunction in vaccinated men,” said Dr. Anthony Fauci, “The symptoms are consistent with the novel coronavirus but include side effects […]

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